SHG: Herman's Hermits: "Can't You Hear My Heartbeat"

Herman’s Hermits: “Can’t You Hear My Heartbeat”
Entered the chart on: 2/20/65
Peaked on: 3/27/65
Weeks at #2: 2
Song at #1: “Stop! In the Name of Love” by the Supremes

Let me tell you the story of Goldie and the Gingerbreads, the first “girl group” to play their own instruments. Goldie (vocals and harmonica), Carole (guitar), Margo (organ) and Ginger (drums), four girls from New York who briefly relocated to London in search of fame and fortune.

It sounds like I’m off on a wild tangent to start this review but stick with me. I swear this connects.

You see, in 1964, the girls’ management offered them a tune called “Can’t You Hear My Heartbeat.” Carole hated it and dismissed it as “bubblegum [expletive],” disgusted that it veered so far from their usual style (imagine a distaff version of the Young Rascals). But Goldie said they had to do it because management had the final say, blah blah blah. The result: a top 40 hit in the UK, television appearances, and so on and so forth.

Meanwhile, over on our side of the pond, Beatlemania had spurred a wave of Anglophilia the likes of which had never been equalled. So it makes sense that MGM, eager to cash in, rush-released a cover version by a group of London pretty boys known as Herman’s Hermits to the US market. Goldie and her cohorts were pissed off. Sure, they didn’t like the song, but they felt it was their song. To be cheated out of a hit in their home country had to be frustrating.

I imagine it wouldn’t have been so bad had the artists doing the song were the actual Beatles or something, as opposed to a gaggle of Bobby Rydells with Cockney accents. Obviously, a manufactured group selected for their non-threatening, boyish looks. Even if their lead singer looks like Bobby Brady. Seriously, have you ever seen Peter Noone and Mike Lookinland in the same room together?



Well, I do like the guitar intro to this one, and it has a nice beat to it. Can’t compare to the beat on “Have I the Right” by the Honeycombs, though. And I’ll always be comparing this to the Gingerbreads’ original. Margo’s swinging Hammond organ and Goldie’s raspy, undeniably rock-inflected voice give a little bit of a flair to what’s otherwise a pretty weak song.

You really don’t get any of that with this version. Peter Noone and co. sing fine, technically, but they’re just so twee. This rendition just winds up pretty flat and empty in the end.

And, as previously stated, it was never all that great a song to begin with.

Rating: 2

SHG: Bobby Vee: "Run to Him"

Bobby Vee: “Run to Him”
Entered the chart on: 9/18/1961
Peaked on: 12/25/1961
Weeks at #2: 1
Song at #1: “The Lion Sleeps Tonight” by the Tokens

Bobby Vee, if I ever think of him at all...actually, let me stop right here. I tend not to think of him at all. He’s never struck me as anyone’s favorite. I can’t imagine legions of raving, screaming, stomping Bobby Vee fans showering him with adulation. He seems like someone who had chart hits mainly to fulfill some kind of quota. The sort of artist where you ask someone about him, they respond with, “Eh, he’s all right I guess.”

Which isn’t to say that his output was completely without worth (he had a decent singing voice and “The Night Has a Thousand Eyes” was well-crafted, if not quite a masterpiece) but the mere mention of his name doesn’t exactly quicken the pulse.

Now, in my copy of the Whitburn Book, I’ve placed check-marks next to all the songs I’ve heard. This isn’t completely helpful, as there’s no context for it. It doesn’t explain where and under what circumstances I heard it. My guess would be that I was listening to some charts-obsessed oldies radio personality, a Dick Bartley or Casey Kasem presentation, probably. More pertinent for our purposes, just because I’ve heard a song doesn’t mean I’ll remember it years later, and that’s definitely the case with “Run to Him.” Not conjuring up memories of any kind of melody based on the title. So let’s “refresh” my “memory” of this one...



The loping rhythm of this almost makes me feel of an old cowboy song, but the swaths of strings and the drippy Johnny Mann Singers tell us we’re solidly in Bobby Rydell territory. That said, this might be the first teen-idol song I’ve heard done with any sort of competence. Yes, it’s sugary-sweet as hell, but it’s at least well-produced and well-written (Gerry Goffin co-wrote it). Yes, I’ll probably forget it as soon as it’s done playing (again) but Bobby’s singing voice is quite spiffy. No punched notes, no overwrought teenage melodrama, just a sweet melody performed well. The chord and key changes on this are actually surprisingly sophisticated for a tune made to appeal to teenaged girls.

Not in love with this, but I appreciate that it’s not just a quickie done with zero effort and hustled out the door to earn a quick buck. Like most of what I’ve heard from him, perfectly adequate.

Rating: 3

SHG: Johnny Tillotson: "Poetry in Motion"

Johnny Tillotson: “Poetry in Motion” Entered the chart on: 10/24/1960 Peaked on: 11/14/1960 Weeks at #2: 1 Song at #1: “Georgia on My Mind” by Ray Charles

Florida native Johnny Tillotson eventually earned his name as a country singer. I say “eventually” because somebody at Cadence Records got the “brilliant” idea to sell the young singer out of the gate as the Dixieland answer to the Philadelphia scene (Frankie Avalon, Bobby Rydell, et al). That may have shifted some units in the short run but it’s pretty much worthless to us now. I should always worry when I get three or four highly-rated songs in a row.



Oh my God, could his voice be any more affected and precious? It’s like he received the direction, “You’re not enunciating enough! Emphasize ev-er-y syl-la-ble clear-ly!” “Ad-o-er”? Ugh!

Everything about this song is just twee beyond belief. Even the saxophone enunciates! And what’s with the wailing female backing singer? Did she get lost on the way to the Paul Anka session?

Eh...it’s not horrible like “Puppy Love” but it sounds like something square parents would cook up that they think their kids might like. I definitely don’t ever need to hear it again.

Rating: 1

SHG: Paul Anka: "Puppy Love"

Paul Anka: “Puppy Love”
Entered the chart on: 3/7/1960
Peaked on: 4/4/1960
Weeks at #2: 2
Song at #1: “Theme From A Summer Place” by Percy Faith

I have been dreading this one.

Actually, I do have a funny story about this one. But not about the original, about the cover by Donny Osmond (Demons in Hell, why would anyone want to cover this monstrosity? Oh, right, it’s the Osmonds. Mike Curb was in charge of them in the 70s, and the man had execrable taste!). I don’t know which of us did it, and I don’t remember how we came across it, but either friend-of-the-show David Perkins or I came across a Real Media/Quicktime snippet of bootleg audio of an audience recording from an Osmond brothers show from circa 1973. Donny’s rendition of “Puppy Love” went a little something like this:

“And they called it...”

[the rest of the song is drowned out by the fortissimo, rodent-like screeching of hundreds of adolescent girls]

I have to wonder if girls reacted to Paul Anka’s original in that manner. And how hormones could possibly suppress the “good taste” indicator so strongly.



[bangs head against desk repeatedly]

We’re back to this then? “They tell us we’re too young to know what real love is...blah blah blah.” At least Bobby Rydell’s song, lame as it was, tried. This is just saccharine, swathed in treacly strings and those hideous “angels in Heaven” choral vocals.

Let’s not even get started on Anka’s vocal performance here, which borders on the comical before spilling over straight into tragedy. He’s so histrionic in his delivery—sobbing, stuttering, whimpering pitifully in a ludicrously exaggerated fashion—I have a hard time believing this isn’t some kind of put-on. Who thought any of this was a good idea?

So quintessentially appalling, I think I might have broken my own rating scale.

Rating: 0 [obviously]

SHG: Bobby Rydell: "Wild One"

Bobby Rydell: “Wild One”
Entered the chart on: 2/8/1960
Peaked on: 3/28/1960
Weeks at #2: 1
Song at #1: “Theme From A Summer Place” by Percy Faith

And so, we’re back to the phony rock teen-idols of the so-called Philadelphia Scene. To be fair to Bobby, he was definitely preferable to the likes of Frankie “I’m plugging my nose to sound more like a teenager with adenoids” Avalon or [shudder] Fabian. Bobby had some actual singing ability, which probably explains why the top brass at Cameo-Parkway paired him up with songs like Domenico Modugno’s classic “Volare.” They wanted you to be sure you knew he could really sing!

But...yeah. That’s damning with faint praise. It’s like saying that getting a poison-oak rash on your arm isn’t as bad as getting one on your eyes. And he still has about as much to do with rock & roll as an accordion.



Sorry, you can doll this up with as much chunky electric guitar and twist-club saxophone, but you can’t fool me. Bobby’s Vegas lounge performer ethos completely swamps any attempt at me taking this seriously as “rock & roll.” Well, that and the shrill female backing chorus, no member of which sounds to be over the age of fifteen.

The “Wild One” of the title is his intended lady love, who he wishes to “be wild about me!” Eh...I’m running out of things to say about this. It doesn’t sound like a “real” song, rather like a song that would appear on a TV show performed by some second-string run-of-the-mill session singer play-acting at being somebody famous and beloved. Somewhat apropos for the future star of Bye Bye Birdie. You could picture Mary Stone on The Donna Reed Show or Linda Williams on Make Room for Daddy twisting to this but real people?

I think they’d prefer Ricky Nelson. Oh, the irony.

Rating: 1

SHG: Paul Anka: "Put Your Head on My Shoulder"

Paul Anka: “Put Your Head on My Shoulder”
Entered the chart on: 9/14/1959
Peaked on: 10/5/1959
Weeks at #2: 3
Song at #1: “Mack the Knife” by Bobby Darin

I’ve been dealing out a lot of fours and fives in this series of late. I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Ladies and gentlemen, that day has arrived.

You see, I knew I’d have to talk about the “teen idols” sooner or later. Tommy Sands was just the tip of the iceberg. That Frankie Avalon tune sitting in the top spot during the Coasters’ entry was the sword of Damocles hanging over this feature until now. 1959 was the year the dam burst and the opportunists flooded the market with a bunch of non-threatening pretty boys designed to make teen girls swoon. In general, they had nothing to do with rock & roll; more a throwback to the old crooner days, minus the quality control. Many of them (I’m looking at you, Fabian) couldn’t even sing; it was all faked by a laborious technique of “punching” in every note and hoping he’d hit it right eventually. Being the producer and/or engineer of one of these sessions must have been a thankless task.

And then we have Canadian import Paul Anka. Paul had a leg-up on the competition in that he could play the piano and wrote his own material. Mind you, that didn’t mean that material was any good. This was the man, after all, that would bring us “You’re Having My Baby,” one of the most cringe-worthy MOR horrors the 70s ever wrought. And yes, that song hit #1. The man has a lot to answer for.



O sweet Zeus, make it stop! The tremolo guitar, the angelic female backing vocals, Anka’s overwrought voice, the cheesy punching of the word “baby,” it’s all too much. He’s certainly no Fats Domino at the ivories, either, his playing, apart from a flamboyant glissando leading into the Eurovision-style key-change at the end, it’s all steady “plink plink plink” with no variation from beginning to end. Before, I was thinking, “well, at least it’s one of his more tolerable songs.” I was wrong. This is worse than I had remembered. Don’t make yourself suffer like I did. Rating: 0

SHG: Ricky Nelson: "Stood Up"

Ricky Nelson: “Stood Up”
Entered the chart on: 12/30/1957
Peaked on: 1/13/1958
Weeks at #2: 3 weeks
Song at #1: “At the Hop” by Danny & the Juniors

Now, I was quick to come to Ricky’s defense, at least a little, during my last review but...come on! “Stood Up”? Ricky Nelson, the most desirable dream date for teenage girls in the late 50s? I believe that like I believe the Crew Cuts were the original artists singing “Sh-Boom.”

I’m sure I’m missing some context here. I never watched Ozzie and Harriet, and I’m sure this song was used, Partridge Family-style, to have Ricky teach a lesson to some high-school heartbreaker or something. Maybe I’m being a bit harsh here. Let’s examine the case of this song.



OK, already I like this better than “A Teenager’s Romance.” It’s more of that old-time rock & roll with some great electric guitar and an infectious beat. That said, after “Great Balls of Fire,” Ricky can’t help but come across as a bit...sedate? I kind of want Jerry Lee Lewis to come up behind him with a pitchfork to put a little more fire into his performance.

So...good, but not great. I like this, but it doesn’t excite me.

And isn’t that what good rock and roll is supposed to do?

Rating: 3

SHG: Ricky Nelson: "A Teenager's Romance"

Ricky Nelson: “A Teenager’s Romance”
Entered the chart on: 5/27/1957
Peaked on: 6/10/1957
Weeks at #2: 1 week
Song at #1: “Love Letters in the Sand” by Pat Boone

Oh dear, we’re back to the teenage exploitation records, aren’t we? Well, sort of. Ricky Nelson tried so hard for rock & roll credibility but it really eluded him until the 70s and his country-rock years with the Stone Canyon Band. Back in the 50s? Yes, he was fighting an uphill battle. In the popular consciousness, he was a radio/TV star using his parents’ Hollywood clout to kick-start a music career. Imperial Records surely just saw him as a cute, non-threatening fresh face that appealed to young girls. He could cover Fats Domino tunes until he was blue in the face, yet it would be stuff like this that the average Joe would wind up mentally associating him with for years.



OK, lyrically this is the same song as “Teen Age Crush.” The exact same. “They tell us we’re too young to know what true love is, blah blah blah.” That said, this is better on every level. I really like the male backing vocals that form the backbone of this tune, and are way up-front right at the start. Oh, that bass singer! I think I’m in love! The sax solo is another nice touch here.

And say what you will about Ricky, he did have a good singing voice. The melody doesn’t overly tax him, and you get the feeling he’d rather be singing “I’m Walkin’” (the flip side of this very single) but his voice is not without expression and pitch control. He does service to the song and proves he’s not just another pretty face.

That said, you can arrange the song as nicely as you please and it won’t cover up the fact that it’s rather lacking in substance. The lyrics, as I’ve already implied, are beyond vapid, and the song itself isn’t anything vastly special, either. I get the feeling that this is fairly typical of Ricky’s less-remembered hits these days: competently-made fluff.

I’d still rather listen to this than Pat Boone any day of the week.

Rating: 2